Enlistment Day

My son was enlisted on Monday.  Almost a week, and I have found it much harder than I had expected. This is odd, because he is going to be back at the end of the month for a couple of days. After that, he gets to come home every weekend. It wasn't like he was studying overseas for a couple of years. This is odd, because I didn't see that much of him even before he was enlisted either. Every Singaporean family with a son goes through this, and there are also girls who sign up for National Service, so this is the norm. What is it that has made this difficult for me?

We went to Pulau Tekong with him on Monday. Coincidentally the younger kids had a day off in-lieu of the school carnival on Saturday. His aunt took the day off. His grandmother couldn't go because it would have been too much walking for her. We met her for lunch after the school carnival so that my son could say good-bye to her. When we arrived on the island, we were not quite sure when we would say our last good-bye to him. Visitors were directed to the buses to take us to their dormitory and the enlistees were directed to another building. I gave him a hug in case we didn't get a chance to later.

The island was more built up than I had imagined. It was like a university campus on an island 15 minutes away from the mainland ferry terminal. The visitors tour took us to the dormitories which looked like HDB blocks. The dorm rooms were spacious and clean. One of my friends commented on my Instagram post that these days the mattresses were so thick. They showed us exhibits and videos of what the training was going to be like and my second son said he wanted to join the army too. After the walkabout, we went to an auditorium where we were briefed on the training framework, key dates, key contacts and lots of assurances that the enlistees were in good hands. He was there, together with the rest of the enlistees, to take their Oath. We say each other but I wasn't sure if he was allowed to speak to civilians.

After the Oath taking, the enlistees stood in attention outside the auditorium waiting to bring their guests  the Food Hall (sounded like Harrods in London). So we got to sit down for a meal. It was so much like his first day in school when he was 6+. We left him with the people in charge and they quickly got on with what they needed to do. We only got to see him during his recess to get some reassurance that he was doing okay. We probably had about 20 minutes at the Food Hall when suddenly the enlistees were asked to say their good-byes. My son had to make his way through the crowd to return his food tray and come back for his things. And in the rush, my wife managed to give him a hug. We then saw him in a line with fellow enlistees before they marched off. My second son took out his little blue handkerchief to waive good-bye to him. I wonder where he got that idea.

Perhaps it was because we all didn't get a chance to say the perfect good-bye. Perhaps it is because when you've grown accustom to someone, you have a need to see them everyday, even if it is just for a minute. Perhaps I am still trying to hold on to the little baby that was my only son for 9 years. Perhaps I am coming to terms with the fact that is just how life is - you give it your best and you let go. Perhaps it is all of the above. 

In this world, we get to experience the depth of God's love through the people and the relationships He gives us. This love never leaves us.

38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord ~ Romans 8:38-39 (NIV)